OK, so I rushed home from a 1a-11:30a shift to see this reunion as I KNEW some thangs were going to go down. This season had so much drama and they’ve all had time to watch the show and act up on Twitter, so I knew the show was going to be hot. Mona starts out on the defensive. She knows the show is ratchet as hell and portrays Black women as quick to flip hoodrats. She defends herself by saying it was never her intent for the show to be a reflection of Black women. I suppose, but it just seems a bit skewed when most Black women on reality TV are more Tami Roman than Claire Huxtable. I’m just saying… Before I go on let me just remind my non black readers that not all black people are angry, loud and willing to fight. Fortunately, the cast of Love and Hip Hop; Atlanta is and that makes for awesome television.
Cue K. Michelle popping off on Karlie 2 minutes into the show. (yay for keeping it positive, Mona and co!) Apparently Karlie said that she was the same age as K and K Michelle said that she marched with Martin Luther King. HAHA. Really? K Michelle lays into Karlie for another two minutes and Karlie just sits there with her “Beat It” tribute dress on. MJ was smiling down from Heaven. Well, if he liked hoodrat shit.
A viewer asks about plastic surgery. Karlie, Joseline and K Michelle had breasts done. Duh. The news of the night came in the bomb that Joseline was born a woman? Mona saw her get naked to take a pregnancy test. Umm is that normal?
They get into Karli running her damned mouth too much and the soundbites are great! Basically we get to re-live all the foolishness and fuckery that was tied to this chick. We also found out that she has a daughter but won’t tell her age. My guess? 28. Funky Dineva shows his wonderful face and asks her about not being signed to Cash Money. Turns out that she wasn’t under cash money management. Like why like about that on television when people can EASILY check facts? Bitch ain’t even got a Wikipedia! (copyright K. Michelle)
K. Michelle tries to come for Rasheeda and her perfectly laid Pocahontas hair. BIG mistake. The Boss showed up and sat the HELL up in her chair. Her hair is obedient as hell and didn’t MOVE. Then K Michelle tries to talk about the bags under Rasheeda’s eyes! Girl almost got another domestic disturbance case just like that. Girl was QUICK!
Next, we get to watch Lil Scrappy put his paws on Steebie. Apparently Mona edited it down to cut back on the violence on the network (side eye) and sat down the two couples involved to delve deeper into the situation.
Mona: so tell us more about what happened
Lil Scrappy: I put my paws on him!
Ian: *dead*
Then they start calling each other bitch this bitch that and a fight almost erupts until MOMMA DEE says “Y’all need to END THIS CONVERSATION!” There were two members of team zest there who were obviously whipped into a tizzy. Steebie is now saying that no paws were laid on him and Scrappy almost takes his belt off (no homo?) in order to show that he will whoop dat ass again.
Finally Momma Dee comes up. Basically she didn’t want it to end in violence (bullshit) but she is the queen and her son is the prince and she can’t have people just coming up in the castle disrespecting her throne. Don’t they typically medicated people who talk like this?!
Next up we touch up the love triangle (well a quadrangle if you include Ariane, who seems to happy to be the fourth) We see a bunch of footage of Mimi getting disrespected and all I can think of is Monica’s “Sideline Ho” Like she got played on national television. Repeatedly. Joseline tells us that she’s not here for marriage: she’s here for dick and money. Just when I think this chick can’t get any deeper… Ariane, checks Steebie in her outfit that I’m sure is a tribute to Judy Jetson. Joseline is asked by Mona if she has any tips for Mimi to handle Steebie. Mona, quit being disrespectful!
***Joseline quote: I’m a woman of god and fuck y’all who don’t believe it!*****
I personally am still trying to process all the foolishness that I just watched. It was extra! I think next week will be great. I am really glad they gave us a preview so I could be ready for that offensive ass hair Shay (That’s Buckeey to most of us) is trying to pull off. It’s like a tribute to turbans and frozen yogurt. I am excited to see next week. Maybe K Michelle will have a wig change or 6! I’m sure Joseline will talk about her love of money, dick and Jesus and I cannot wait!
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